Mental Health Hotline Joke Audio

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Answering machine message at a Mental Hospital

(1 days ago) WEBIf you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are …

https://www.daveschultz.com/humor/answering-machine-message-at-a-mental-hospital/

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Mental Help Hotline - YouTube

(3 days ago) WEBWhat you don't want to hear when you call the Mental Help HotlineHello, and Welcome to the Mental Health Hotline: If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqyiYd4iCYY

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Mental Health Telephone Answering Machine - Boulder Therapist …

(1 days ago) WEBIf you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press - no one will answer. If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696. If you have a nervous disorder, please …

http://bouldertherapist.com/html/humor/MentalHealthHumor/mentalhealthhotline.html

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Answering Machine At A Mental Hospital : r/Jokes - Reddit

(6 days ago) WEBAnswering Machine At A Mental Hospital. "Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline " If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co …

https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/1a6qqe/answering_machine_at_a_mental_hospital/

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Hello and Welcome to the mental health hotline : …

(4 days ago) WEBIf you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press; no one …

https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/6msdh5/hello_and_welcome_to_the_mental_health_hotline/

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Mental health hotline - Joke eBaum's World

(5 days ago) WEBMental health hotline. kokq Published 12/18/2008. "Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline" - If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. - If …

https://www.ebaumsworld.com/jokes/mental-health-hotline/80460660/

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Answering Service - Joke eBaum's World

(1 days ago) WEBAnswering Service. "Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask …

https://www.ebaumsworld.com/jokes/answering-service/80573432/

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Mental Health Hotline : Free Download, Borrow, and …

(7 days ago) WEBMental Health Hotline Audio With External Links Item Preview Mental Health Hotline. Topics mental. hahhhaaa Addeddate 2011-05-31 18:06:50 Identifier …

https://archive.org/details/MentalHealthHotline

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220 Hilariously Healing Mental Health Puns That Will Lift Your Spirits

(1 days ago) WEBRome wasn’t built in a day, but my anxiety sure is. 7. They say to be yourself, but I can never seem to find the lost and found. 8. When others throw stones at …

https://punsteria.com/mental-health-puns/

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Social media posts warn not to call 988. What you need to know

(8 days ago) WEBMental health advocates celebrated the launch of the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, but some people voiced concerns that using the service could lead to police …

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2022/08/11/1116769071/social-media-posts-warn-people-not-to-call-988-heres-what-you-need-to-know

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10 Jokes for People Living With Mental Illness - The Mighty

(9 days ago) WEB2. People ask me if I suffer from bipolar disorder. I do, but only half the time. The other half I thoroughly enjoy it. submitted by Joanna Peterson. 3. Dating with …

https://themighty.com/topic/mental-health/jokes-about-mental-illness/

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Mental Health Hotline Voicemail Greeting

(4 days ago) WEBIf you're delusional press seven. Your call will be transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully the small voice will tell you which number to press if you're …

https://www.youmail.com/community/greeting/mental_health_hotline

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Why Hello! Thanks for calling the Mental Health Hotline! : r/Jokes

(4 days ago) WEBr/Jokes • 7 yr. ago. by Deitz69. Why Hello! Thanks for calling the Mental Health Hotline! If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask …

https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/533dgc/why_hello_thanks_for_calling_the_mental_health/

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Mental Health Jokes - 61 Hilarious Mental Health Jokes

(8 days ago) WEBA man in a mental health facility was having an argument. A man in a mental health facility was arguing with a hazelnut. "I'm not crazy! You're crazy!" He says. The squirrel …

https://upjoke.com/mental-health-jokes

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Crisis Text Line Text HOME to 741741 Free, 24/7 Mental Health …

(1 days ago) WEBCrisis Text Line is a nonprofit organization that provides free, 24/7, confidential text-based mental health support in English and Spanish. Since its launch in 2013, people in need …

https://www.crisistextline.org/

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Psychiatrist phone joke Mental Health Forum

(8 days ago) WEBOct 4, 2010. #1. Psychiatrist phone. Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask …

https://www.mentalhealthforum.net/forum/threads/psychiatrist-phone-joke.16018/

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Mental health hotline. : r/Jokes - Reddit

(Just Now) WEBIf you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will …

https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/12g3gs2/mental_health_hotline/

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New mental health hotline number 988 will open soon for NJ

(8 days ago) WEBGene Myers. NorthJersey.com. 0:00. 2:20. New Jersey residents experiencing a mental health crisis will soon be able to reach a help hotline by dialing …

https://www.northjersey.com/story/news/new-jersey/2022/06/30/nj-mental-health-crisis-hotline-988/7761058001/

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HOTLINE: (201) 262-4357 (HELP) - bergen.org

(6 days ago) WEBHOTLINES CONTACT, WE CARE, INC Local Hotline Number: (908) 232-2880 OR Text: "CWC" to 839863 (M, W, F 4:00pm-10:00pm) National Hotline Number: 800-SUICIDE …

https://www.bergen.org/cms/lib/NJ02213295/Centricity/Domain/321/HOTLINES.pdf

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Bergen County Community Mental Health Resource List

(6 days ago) WEBMental Health Law Project (MHLP) Accepting referrals via telephone Building/courts are closed to public, with exception of emergent actions Postponing upcoming Social …

https://www.co.bergen.nj.us/images/About_Bergen_County/News__Press/COVID/COVID-19_Community_Resources_04_23_2020.pdf

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Suicide Hotline is a joke : r/mentalhealth - Reddit

(Just Now) WEBSuicide Hotline is a joke. I'm a 24 year old guy and just called the suicide hotline for the first time. All they did was ask me a bunch of questions for a survey then referred me to …

https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/vtvwsc/suicide_hotline_is_a_joke/

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